A reBUTTal to “say no to thongs”

It’s 2015 and there are still articles published on The New York Times that try to politicize women’s bodies and their choices. At the time, I’m sure that Hayley Phelan’s intent was harmless with “Young Women Say No to Thongs“– she merely spotted what seemed to be a radical new trend in underwear preference. What happens down under is completely preferential though. Why do women’s bodies have to be a political toys all the time? It really got my panties in a bunch…

If a woman wants to wear granny panties, that’s fine. If she wants to wear thongs, so be it. Frankly, it’s nobody’s business. It’s wrong to pit women against each other based on underwear preferences because it’s YOUR body + YOUR choice. Ladies, wear whatever makes you feel most comfortable! That’s what feminism is all about. (IMO, going commando seems like it would be the most “feminist” choice though… It’s so freeing! Seriously, try that while also going bra-less sometime, it’ll change your life.) Wearing thongs doesn’t make you anti-feminist.

Personally, I prefer fuller underwear, but I like to have a variety. I’ve got granny panties, lace panties, mesh panties, spandex, boyshorts… You get the point. (This is already TMI for my family.) All different styles that provide me with the same level of comfort. However, I’ll slip on a thong when I’m wearing leggings or spandex because news flash: panty lines are not cute! I wear shorts under tighter dresses because sometimes you just feel better when there’s an additional layer in-between for extra protection of the cooch. (Also, will Sisqo please stand up and #takebackthethong ???) Outgrowing Victoria’s Secret and realizing that guys opinions are shit is an incredibly satisfying feeling, but like most things that involve the vagina, underwear is a personal choice that no woman should feel pressured in swaying one way or the other.

When I buy underwear, I think about how cute I’ll look in it, not how sexy some dude is going to think if he’s lucky enough to see me in it. It makes me feel good, and that’s why I take it home. I’ll never forget this one time when I went to Victoria’s Secret last year and I purchased five panties that were all black– the woman behind the register was so confused as to why I didn’t want any colored or patterned underwear and kept implying that I wasn’t making the right choice. Like excuse me, are these panties for you? No? Then please kindly GTFO and ring me up. (Side note: This year, I stopped wearing bras “with support” and it’s honestly the best decision I’ve ever made for myself. My boobs have never been happier in cotton and lace bralettes.)

My Pussy My Choice Art Print by The Escape Artist (Jolie Noggle).

My Pussy My Choice Art Print by The Escape Artist (Jolie Noggle).

What also bugged me about the article was the inclusion of these new wave pop-up panty shops. I just can’t believe that people are cool with companies charging $30-$40 for one pair of cotton panties. Is it made of egyptian cotton? Is this the softest underwear in the entire world? No? Then why would anyone opt for that when they can get multiple cute pairs from Target or better yet, wait for the summer steals at Victoria’s Secret (*5 for $27) or Aerie (7 for $35)? I’m sorry, but there are so many more affordable alternatives for underwear, but no disrespect to women that want to splurge. Again, it’s your choice and you shouldn’t be shamed for it. (Tbh, I will probably purchase a pair of Me and You’s FEMINIST panties when I can treat myself again because they look cute and comfortable, but not right now.) Jia Tolentino clapped back on Jezebel and highlighted the fact that empowerment is “almost exclusively used by people trying to sell you something“.

As a friend of mine said, “My booty likes diversity.” At the end of the day, you have to listen to your behind on this one. The booty wants what the booty wants, period. *~*~* May all of your underwear endeavors be pro-choice *~*~*


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